Thursday, November 30, 2006

The Happily Ever After

If anyone happens to pay any attention to the entertainment news (and I use that term loosely), you've probably heard by now that Pam Anderson and Kid Rock have split up after a whopping four months of marriage. Ah yes...four months. But hey, they gave it a real go, right?

Insert eye roll here.

You know, these people were together long enough before the marriage to know who each other were. There shouldn't have been any serious surprises after the ceremony. Which begs the question - why did they bother getting married in the first place? And why, after they were married, did the individual and their behavior become unacceptable then when it obviously wasn't before?

Disposable marriages. That's what I call them. Hollywood seems awfully fond of them. I think they're in love with the myth. I think they like the hype and attention. But when the deed is done and reality sinks in, it doesn't fit the picture, so they toss it out without even an effort. Like disposable contacts that you replace after the 30 day expiry date.

And it makes me wonder. Most of these Hollywood people started off with normal lives. They lived in towns and cities like the rest of us, went to school, had families, parents, siblings, maybe a part-time job and the local fast food joint. Whatever. Normal life. So at what point did the knowledge of normal get so skewered? What was it that made their perception of love and marriage turn into this warped version of musical relationships where if they didn't like the one they were in after a short period of time, they could just wait until the music stopped and grab the closest one to them to replace it?

What makes them think that happily ever after just happens without any effort on their part?

And why do I care?

Probably because being a romance writer it angers the bejesus out of me to see people treat the state of love and marriage with such a flippant attitude that it demeans the whole thing. Love and marriage should never be a disposable quantity. There isn't enough of it to go around for it to be squandered in such a cavalier manner.

13 comments:

Anne M said...

I think a lot more women would get divorced, and a lot quicker too, if they had the financial resources that actors have - especially if there are no kids involved. Divorce is to be avoided for most normal people. It's messy with custody, houses, limited finances, etc., Much easier to just shoot him.

Erin said...

Celebrity marriages are what annoy me about the kafuffle over gay marriages.

No, stay with me, it does make sense. ;)

The argument against same sex marriage is that it is potentially damaging to the fine institution that is marriage.

HOW is it that two people wanting to get married because they're in love, and happen to be the same sex, worse for the "institution of marriage" than celebs who throw their marriages out the window after 55 hours or 4 months or whatever?

Durned stupid, if you ask me.

annette said...

Too funny, Anne! LOL But if you shoot him, just make sure you hide the body really well. And that you have a solid alibi. :-)

I heard one report that said it was because of a comment KR made about shooting a deer. Ummm, if he is a hunter and she is an animal activist, maybe they should have realized this wouldn't work.

I think she is still in love with Tommy Lee, and he with her, so I'm betting they will be back together soon.

Okay, I have to go buy a dress. I loathe clothes shopping, so Lord knows what kind of outfit I'll end up with. :-p

annette said...

Of course, when I said 'you', I didn't mean YOU, Anne. I know you would never shoot your DH. :-)

Kelly, I think fame does weird things to people. If the person becomes famous when they are young, they never get a chance to experience being "normal". Maybe they get addicted to seeing their names in the headlines. And maybe they have a skewed perception on reality.

I'm with Erin on this one. Who cares if it is a different sex or same sex marriage?

Okay, I really am going dress shopping. Blech!

Kelly said...

Yes, Pam and Tommy Lee. Now THERE'S a healthy relationship.

Anonymous said...

No, a healty relationship is Tom and Katie. *shudder*

Kelly said...

Hey, you made me throw up a little.

Tess said...

Alas, it's not just celebrities who engage in disposable marriages. I know couples who've split up with what seems very little effort to save things. Though I do know others who've obviously tried and just aren't right for each other.

Agree with Erin about gay marriage - how can IT harm the institution when one considers what so many hetero couples have already done.

Marriage is W-O-R-K as well as love, sunshine and roses. Understand that going in or you'll be sorely disappointed. But I can say after sixteen years, it's the best work I've ever done :-) And worth every minute.

Melissa Marsh said...

Speaking from my own experience, marriage is incredibly hard work. We've went through TWO, yes, TWO separations. Am I a glutton for punishment? No, I just want to make it work. And it's going a lot better now. (You know men - they need a swift kick every once in awhile).

As far as celebrity marriages go, I think fame DOES mess with you. Being in the public eye must give them a weird sort of identity crisis.

Rene said...

I totally agree with you. Believe me, there are times I would dearly love to tell my husband where to go, but one, finances aren't worth it, custody issues would be a bitch and next week I'll be madly in love with him again.

As you say, marriage is a lot of work. My theory is that these people are so used to life being easy on them, they are shocked when they actually have to put effort into them.

BTW, I'm really enjoying "The Historian." It took me awhile to get into it, but I am really liking it now. There is more to this book than a vampire story.

Shelli Stevens said...

I think it's absolutely hilarious why they broke up. Over Borat. I think that's the movie/guys name. Hee hee.

I gave up trying to understand love in hollywood.

Lexi said...

Yeah, what you said!!!!

Peggy said...

It's called PUBLICITY! Those egos need it---not to mention their bank accounts. Particularly if they have no talent to fall back on, or falling in the popular poll such as Tom Cruise.