Tuesday, September 05, 2006

Weddings, Bloody Gashes & the Dreaded Synopsis

Well for starters, the wedding was amazing. My brother did an awesome job officiating the ceremony with a perfect blend of seriousness and humor, not to mention a quote from Rocky Balboa and an impersonation to go with it (...I got gaps, you got gaps. Together, we fill each other's gaps...).

The reception started with the first dance - Tony Bennett singing You Look Wonderful Tonight and then my sister and Dad danced to Garth Brooks, If Tomorrow Never Comes. Dad picked that one out for them. And of course we capped off the night in true style with the final song being Bubbles from the Trailer Park Boys belting out Liquor & Whores. What can I say, we Boyces can't stay serious for more than a few minutes at a time.

The following day the happy couple left for their honeymoon. The plan was to get in the car and drive, no set destination in mind. The day after that, my mother calls me up around noon hour.

Mom: Kelly, I need you to drive out to your sister's house to get your father (he was whipper snipping their lawn in their absence). I've had an accident.

Me: (realizing Mom is home alone with the baby) Okay, what kind of accident.

Mom: I've sliced my hand with the knife really bad. There's a lot of blood. I need you to go get your father (which is a 10 minute drive out, another 10 coming back).

Me: No, I'm coming up now. (I live 2 minute away)

Mom: But you need to get your Dad.

Me: Nope. I've got first aid training. I'll be right there.

Mom: Okay.

Me: (jumping around trying to get dressed while I dial my brother's phone number who lives 2 streets over). Hi Joanne, is Craig there?

Jo: He's sleeping (two small children, school term about to start and a severe case of sleep deprivation).

Me: Wake him up. I've got an emergency.

Jo: What's wrong.

Me: It's a family emergency--get him. (I'm not heavy into long explanations during times of crisis. I prefer an economy of words. Unfortunately, my lack of explanation had Jo thinking someone had died so she went flying up the stairs in a bit of a panic. Oopsss...)

I give Craig the explanation and tell him to meet me at Mom's. Meanwhile, I grab the big stack of gauze and sticky tape I had left over my dog's last surgery and drive up to my Mom's. Luckily, little Malcolm is napping and has slept through Mom's gouging of the hand. And she wasn't kidding, there was a lot of blood. I do my little first aid thing, get her bandaged up with gauze and a bright neon wrap (hey, it was all the vet had!) and tell her to apply pressure, a fact that keeps slipping her mind as she tries to go back to the stove and stir the apples for the applesauce she was making. Just then my brother arrives, his own first aid kit in hand. I tell him I'm taking Mom to the ER but I need him to stay with Malcolm. At which point Mom tries to give him feeding instructions for Mac when he wakes up, as she tries to stir the apples again. Craig uses his 'stern' voice and tells her he has two kids, can read labels, and doesn't need instructions now get in the car, at the same time I’m turning off the stove and telling her she can deal with the apples when she gets back.

And off we go to the ER where we wait for two hours before getting in. And then of course doesn't the doctor turn out to be a good friend of my brother's. He stitches Mom up and three hours after we left, we are back home, just as Dad arrive back from my sister's house. We tell him his plans for the next few days are cancelled. Since Mom can't use her hand, he's just become primo babysitter. Should be interesting.

Of course, since my afternoon was eaten up in the ER, I didn't get to my synopsis, so I'm a little behind the eight ball with only this week to go before it is due to be sent off. I'm still not happy with the chapter. I think I need to cut a section, which means adding more to fill out the page requirement of 25 pages. This morning I started the synopsis using the Lovers' Journey as a template. Hopefully that will make the process a little easier.

6 comments:

Tess said...

Sounds like a fab wedding and party!!

Yikes on the gash - good thing your family all live so close to each other. LOL re your dad being a caregiver. My dad had to do that when my mum broke her wrist in the late 90s. It turned out better than I thought it would.

Hope that synopsis goes well. The LJ is a great template to use.

Melissa Marsh said...

How fortunate that you all live so close together like that. Your family sounds very close - a blessing to be sure!

LOVE the bridesmaid dresses - what a pretty color! And the wedding sounds like a blast. I'd also love to just get in the car and drive anywhere - what an adventure!

Shelli Stevens said...

Ouch! Scary about your mom's hand. And you look absolutely gorgeous! (Of course the bride does too, but you have a fabulous smile!)

Stacy Dawn said...

Yikes! Glad your mom is okay and the wedding went well.

Your little nephew is a doll!!

Julie S said...

Okay. It's not at all funny that your mom hurt her hand, but the way you told it cracked me up.

Love the bridesmaid dress, btw.

rapture said...

Kelly I loved your site and better yet, love your blog...you made my life seem somewhat normal. The wedding pics are great. Love the red zone - Renee