Wednesday, September 05, 2007

Polar Bear Dude

On Sunday after ball, Maxx and I went to see Confessions of a Medium at the Atlantic Fringe Festival. It was really interesting and as we were moseying our way down to the waterfront to catch the ferry home we had a bit of a wait. So we grabbed a burger at the Burger Shack and plunked down at one of the picnic tables.

Now there were a fair amount of bikers around. Not your dangerous type bikers, but mostly bike enthusiasts. Not unusual in the summer. But there was this one guy by the burger stand who was a bit older. He was lingering around and reminded me of some salty sea captain mixed with a small dose of Hells Angels. I noticed he had a business card laminated and draped around his neck. I figured he had something to do with one of the tours prominent on the waterfront during the summer. We walked past him and sat down. As we are eating our burgers, Biker Dude ambles over. I notice the business card says "Polar Bear" and what I thought was "Tours" underneath that. He stops next to us, looks at me and goes, "What's your sign?"

I eyeballed Polar Bear Dude and tried to determine if I'd just been transported back to the seventies or not. I looked around. Nope. Still in 2007. "Capricorn," I told him.

So then he proceeds to ask me some other questions. What's your favorite color and give me three reasons why. What's your favorite animal and give me three reasons why? Favorite body of water? And if you were locked in a room with no windows, doors or light, how would you feel? By the second question I was on to him. He claimed to be a fortune teller, said that was what he did for a living, but I'd had this quiz before. It's rampant on the email loops. The color tells you how you see yourself, the animal how others see you, etc. But Polar Bear Dude kept going off on these tangents where he totally lost me, his explanations doubling back on themselves and veering off until I began to wonder if he had lost track of what he was saying and was simply rambling until he found his way back. Finally he looks at me and goes, "Understand what I'm saying?"

I blinked. "Uh...what was that middle part again?"

It was quite comical. Finally we had to leave to catch the ferry, but as we were making our escape he handed us his card. It read Polar Bear Tarot - fortune telling, tarot cards, dream analysis and something else. Individual or group readings. Uh huh. Thanks, dude. As we're going into the ferry terminal Maxx and I were joking at the response we'd get if we invited him over to do a group reading with our friends. I can just hear it now. "Hey, who invited the Hell's Angel?" Or, "Arrh matey, is that Cap'n Highliner I see?"

It seems every time Maxx and I go somewhere strange things happen to us. I think we may have both been born under a very strange star.


maxx said...

hahhaahahah that's so funny. I'm sitting here giggling away in my pod at the whole absurdity of a guy who looks like Santa dressed as a Hells Angel giving 'Tarot readings'.

But that whole polar bear thing is starting to nag at me. Wonder if there's a book on that.

Kelly said...

Yeah, I know. I couldn't make the connection on the polar bear and the fortune telling. Weird.

Tess said...

Yeah, the polar bear thing does seem a tad weird. But then it doesn't sound like this guy is normal in the first place :)

annette said...

Isn't there a Polar Bear club where the members run into the ocean on New Years Day? Or something like that. Maybe he's a member.

Kelly said...

This guy didn't look healthy enough to withstand the rigors of subzero ocean temps.

Annie Mac said...

I think you should have taken a picture with him.

maxx said...

heheheh there's always this weekend... Regulators... Mount Up!

julia said...

Probably, once upon a dope-less star, he may have been able to pull together a reading. Sadly, he must have sacrificed a last neuron to that last inhale.