Tuesday, September 06, 2005


I have spent most of the morning trying to fit The Outlaw Bride into the story evolution worksheet and it feels like the story is starting to fall apart, or it's out of sequence, or there are sections where I’m thinking, 'what the heck are these people doing and what is their motivation?'. I hate those days when you look at something you've spent a year or more slaving over and think it's all a bunch of crap and should be torched. I know the spine of the story is good, and I'm just feeling frustrated, that eventually everything will work itself out, I just have to look at it logically, but this is the last thing I needed this morning.

I spent most of yesterday being stressed out because my dog was sick. I think she's doing better this morning - she's keeping her food down so far, but the idea that I might have to go another round with vet appointments, etc has me ready to tear my hair out. It's like I just start to think things are going to be okay and something else happens. Sometimes you just want to throw your arms up and say,
'Fine, I give up! You win!'

The long weekend, which I had hoped to be a bit of a kick back, relax weekend ended up being anything but. I spent three days stacking two cords of wood in my shed until every muscle in my body ached. But at least it's done and that's one less thing I have to think about.

The next few weekends again are incredibly hectic and while they're filled with things I want to do, there's a part of me that is saying it just wants to take a vacation from my life. I want to hole up in a cabin somewhere and just forget the rest of the world exists for a little while, or go down south and soak up the rays, or get lost in the south of France never to be heard from again...but sadly, it is not to be. I must now pack it in and go to the day job, leaving behind a story evolution worksheet that is in shambles, and try not to think of the worse case scenario with the pooch. I'm beginning to think happy endings only show up at the end of a book.

This concludes today's pity party. Thanks for stopping by. And yes, I would like some cheese with that whine.


Nikki said...

The good news is - summer's almost officially over! I don't know what it is about summer that gets me so anxious -- I think it's just so much to do and I feel so guilty not being outside for it all. But now that it's winding down regular routines can go back into place and you may feel like you have time for stuff again.

And calling in sick once in awhile to work isn't a bad idea either :)

Melissa Marsh said...

Hope your doggie is feeling better! And yeah, I've had those moments when I thought my first WIP was complete crap. Thankfully, it seems like those moments are few and far in between.
Yeah, maybe playing hooky from work is in order???

Kelly said...

I had a sick day last week so I think I'll have to put a hold on taking any mental health days. Although I feel like I could use one.

kacey said...

hope the dog feels better soon!

You WERE industrious this weekend. But I'm like you. I SO would love a week in a cabin in the woods. Far away from people and life.

Peggy said...

Yeah, I was going to recommend the sick day too! Though I always felt kinda funny about it after a long weekend. Why is it we care what our fellow employees think???

Hope pooch is feeling better. And if you've got the sick days coming to ya, take 'em. Nothing made me more sicker than those people who built up their sick days to outrageiously inhumane numbers!

Erin said...

Ouch, sorry to hear that Cooper had a rough weekend (and, therefore, so did you). Hope you both continue to feel better.

As for your story...yeah, step back for a bit until your sense of logic kicks back into gear. You know you're a good writer, people have praised Outlaw Bride, you're just having a moment of self-doubt.

Now, what type of cheese would you prefer, anyway? ;)

Tess said...

Kelly - Sorry to hear about Coop. Hope he's ok. I know what you mean - if it isn't one thing, it's another.

And I totally get the whole wanting to set your ms on fire. Though with me it's more like wanting to toss it under a bus (have no idea why - that's just the impulse I get).

Re: stacking all that wood - well, at least you'll be warm this winter and had a good workout :-)

And here's some Brie for you!

Nikki said...

Poor Coop - I didn't even mention him! You're poor doggie's had such a bad year -- I hope he's doing okay today!